Humble Pie

Wednesday we had another track workout. The workout consisted of a ten minute warm up jog, 1x400--recovery lap
1x800--recovery lap
1x1200--recovery lap
1x1600--recovery lap
ten minute cool down.
The goal of this was to keep the same pace. So, the time you ran the first 400 should be the pace of each real lap thereafter... the 800 time should be double the 400 time, the 1200 triple, etc. I stupidly went out kinda fast on the first 400. I was 4 seconds off for the 800, which is almost 'okay', but the time gap of where I should have been between where I was grew with each set. It was frustrating, I won't lie. Something was weird, I was just NOT feelin' it that night. Honestly, I started the 1600 and for the first 200 meters all I could think was 'I do not want to do this anymore, I want to stop.' Two things prevented me from becoming a quitter: 1) My Teammates in Training-- there were a solid 30 other people there and I got dubbed as an 'athletic person' and I didn't want to quit in front of them, and 2)I kept thinking about people with blood cancers. I can't imagine how many times they 'do not want to do it anymore.' The consequences of their quitting are far greater, however, than looking foolish in a crowd. The fact of the matter is that they have no choice but to continue fighting. Certainly if they can continue to fight their blood cancer battles-- I can certainly finish this workout. So I finished. Not nearly as strong as I had in the past and not nearly as well as I'd hoped, but I didn't quit. It was very humbling though-- one man goes "geez, what happened to you??" Super humbling-- espeically since I was still on a 'first-place' cloud from previous group running adventures. Not only am I embarrassed at my poor performance, but also my attitude. As of late I have just been kinda apathetic towards training appropriately for the triathlon. So far I've been 'doing my own thing' and up to a point that was okay. But it's at the point where the workouts are legitimately challenging and I NEED to get on the program, but there is something lacking within me and I can't put my finger on it which makes it that much more frustrating. My one thought as to why this is all going down is that I started my job this week and it is just exhausting. I am in orientation, and this first week has been purely classroom stuff, but it is just insanely overwhelming and draining. I leave at 7 and get home around 5:30-6:00. The last thing I've wanted to do when I've gotten home is to workout, which is a complete 180 from who I am. I have even lost my appetite which is weirdER-- I'm a vacuum usually and now I'm just... meh. I'm hoping that a weekend off from work will snap me outta this funk, cause it's unacceptable!!

In better news-- a couple more donations have come in which is super encouraging. Another soccer teammate, and two native Salem-ers that I went to high school with all chipped in to help cure blood cancers. I am just so shocked that we've raised $1,405! I am so proud o everyone who has helped out in any way. August 4th is JUST around the corner-- nine days. If we can get $66 in donations per day, we'll meet the deadline. Keep spreading the word like the Plague and we'll be set. My dad continues to shout it from the rooftops; he sent out an email to everyone he works with telling them about this great opportunity to donate to LLS. My parents are pretty adamant about the fact that while they support me in the things I do, they (understandably) don't want to rope their friends into my fundraising efforts. So I am very grateful for the publicity my dad has created!!

Tomorrow morning our group training consists of a super-mini-triathlon. I think it will be like 30 minutes total. The goal is to just get a sense for what the transition will feel like and that sort of thing. A trial run, if you will. Also, I signed up for the South Shore Triathlon which will be next Saturday. It is a super-sprint. Despite my begging, no friends wanted to do it with me, so I'll be alone-- I'm really quite nervous. We'll see what happens.

Please donate!!